Resident Evil 4ish: PARODY
by Reiko N Josh
Summary: What would happen if Leon was sent to africa too? Who's dumber Chris or Leon? Can Ada control and maintane her sanity? And what is Leons obsession with pie! WARNING: severe stupidity! Read at own risk!
1. Chapter 1

Resident Evil 4 1/2

Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil...mainly because i didn't come up with it....ah well....

Oh one more thing before i begin! i originaly wrote this story for a school assianment and it was inspired by a story called "RE4: Infected With Dumbness" read it if u get the chance....it'll blow you're mind with laughter! so another thing i don't own is Leon Scott Kennedy's personality....on with the show...er...story...

INTRO: After the events in Peublo spain! Leon settled down with Ada....Yea i know...i didn't think he had it in him.  
They had a beutiful baby girl which they named Sora, as Sora grew her interests in her mother and fathers work grew,  
now at age 14 she is very skilled with a variety of guns.

CHAPTER 1: Sora Wong Kennedy

Sora was walking down the streets of washington , her long orange hair just hanging below her shoulder blades. She wore a red T-shirt with white cargo shorts.  
her worn out tenni shoes slopping through the puddles as she ran. she was headed for the white house to give her her father Leon his lunch which he stupidly forgot AGAIN....as you do or don't know Leon was assigned to protect the presidents family...

AUTHOR: "And i'm not a genius on politics cause i don't know how long a presidents term of office lasts...."

Sora stopped in her tracks... "Who said that?" She looked around.

Author: "ummm.....You're consiounce?"

Sora was not as dumb as her father but she wasnt exactly head of her class iether...She believed the lie. "Conciounce...so you can read me bed time stories right!?"  
there was no reply...Suddenly she heard an explosion from the white h"use which she was standing infront of. She seen 5 wierd looking guys go in with sharp weapons. Sora ran up to them and jumped infront of them. and reached for her gun that was tucked in the back of her shorts waist only to find it wasn't there.

XXXX FLASH BACK XXXX

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Sora jumped for joy while holding her customized 9mm handgun. "YEA!!! Stupid itchy stuffed bears!!!" Just then Ada burst into the room raining white fluffy stuffing from her rare limited addition chinese bears collection now blown to pieces.  
"Sora! You're grounded! No guns for 3 months!"

XXX END OF FLASHBACK XXX

"Oh...Yea i forgot about that...." Sora charged into the white house and drop kicked one of the wierd guys and then tripped another. she kicked the crap outa them until they finaly fled.

Sora was then tackled by the secret services that probably should have been there 5 minutes ago...a man spoke while flashing his badge "You have the right to remain silent..anything you say or do will...." WAM! he doubled over in pain as Sora kicked him in a painful spot. She knocked the others off her and jumped up on the table.  
"Pro wrestling all star super spectacular divey thing!" Sora dove off the table and knocked out the other 2 secret service people. but then she was captured by more.

"I want a lawyer! my dad is Leon scott kennedy! Get off me jerks!" and from there she just yellied in chinese that she learned from her mother.

A girl stood at the top of the stairs watching she had blond hair and wore a sweater around her neck. she was like a female carlton!

She followed into the room where they were interogating Sora once they were gone she entered the room. "Hey would Leon be you're father by any chance?"  
Sora crossed her arms. "That depends...." The girl waited...."On what?" Sora turned to her and smiled "On wether i can get any skittles in this place! i LOVE skittles! the whole skittle thing! taste the rainbow!" The girl laughed a little. "My names Ashley...I'll take you home..."

CHAPTER 1 END

Me: ok thats the end of that chapter it was short for some reason i can't explain! when i typed it up for my school report this chapter took up 2 pages!  
and all my chapters were usually 2 or 3 pages 4 pages on a good day!

R & R

criticism and flames will be returned with rude comments so BRING IT ON!!! but seriously....no flames... o.o 


	2. Chapter 2 punishment and a new adventure

Random Evil ch 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing except Sora…

In this chapter is the first chapter where u will see how stupid Leon can be.

CHAPTER 2: Punishment and a new adventure…

Ashley took Sora home. But nothing could prepare the 14 year old for the wrath of Ada!! And her Belt of justice!!

Author: "Isn't using a belt on you're kids considered child abuse? Not in Ada's book!"

While Sora was pouting and raging in her room about the butt whooping she just received. Leon, Ada and Ashley talked ever so calmly…

Leon sat on the couch like a scared little boy as Ada and Ashley assaulted each other verbally!

"He likes me best! that's why he chose me to marry you tramp!"

Shouted Ada. Ashley screamed at Ada "Shut up you black pixy haired

Ass'less Harpie!"

Ada stood up. "Get Out Of My House!!!!"

Sora opened her bedroom door. "Don't yell at Ashley!"

Ada yelled at Sora "Get back in you're room!!!"

Author: "And you thought they had a happy family?"

Ashley left enraged…

XXX ELSEWHERE XXX

People with red eyes staggered through the streets of Washington

And were killing people.

XXX With Leon and Ada XXX

Leon and Ada were in the living room talking when the phone rang

Ada answered it. "Hello Kennedy residence…Mr. President? A mission?

Down town? Stop repeating what you say?…oh sorry sir….yes sir…"

Leon grabbed the phone "I'll be expecting my payment in Pie! No arguments!"

Ada smacked him upside the head and took the phone back. "Ignore him. Bye!"

They left but little did they know they had an eaves dropper.

XXX with Ada and Leon XXX

Ada and Leon shot theyre hand guns rapidly fending off countless people

They looked to be African Americans although some were white.

Leon unleashed his Kennedy Kick of Doom (Authors note: for more detailed info on Kennedy kick of doom or KKD for short , read RE4: infected with dumbness)

The man Leon kicked flew back and hit the Lincoln memorial statue.

Once he hit it his head splattered and a plant like worm grew from its neck.

Leon freaked out "it's the ghost of the Las plagus viruses come back to haunt me!"

Leon pulled out a tommy gun. Ada stared at him "Wait where did you get…"

He opened fire completely ignoring Ada he shouted out "Taste the power of the Don!"

Ada rolled her eyes "You were watching that stupid godfather movie again weren't you!?"

Soon the infected people were all dead and Leon was out of bullets for the tommy gun.

They moved on to the next area.

XXX with Sora XXX

Sora had practically torn the house apart trying to find her hand gun and ammunition

That must be hidden in her mom's legendary hiding spot.

She tossed a bowling ball out of the closet "Where do mom's get their hiding skills!?"

Then she saw the bowling ball had accidentally opened a secret compartment panel in the wall. Ada did a victory dance that was more like crump dancing or break dancing.

Or both….

She walked over. It was obviously not her hand gun…but her birthday present!

A limited adition caster hand gun complete with 5 boxes of different colored shells

Each shell shoots something different!

XXX with Ada and Leon XXX

Ada and Leon were back to back and surrounded by countless infected people!

Suddenly there was an evil laughter and the people halted in their tracks.

"mwuhahahahaaa! Leon! You saved me the trouble of tracking you down!"

After that A tall blond haired guy with a red French hat and camo pants jumped down from

A tree! Leon threw his hands up "Krauser buddy! You're alive! it's a miraculable!!"

Author: "you mean miracle?"

"Kazoon tite…" said Leon

Author: "I didn't sneeze!"

Krauser became impatient "Hello!! Bad guy trying to be evil over here!….anyway..

Don't you remember anything that happened 13 years ago Leon!?"

XXX FLASH BACK XXX

Leon and Krauser ran though a forest completely made out of chocolate!

Krauser bit a tree, Leon bit a deer which bled chocolate blood! Then they ran circles

Around a chocolate milk pond singing "I believe in magic"

XXX END FLASH BACK XXX

Krauser was majorly irritated "Don't EVER imagine that AGAIN!…Now die!"

Just as he was about to give the signal for the infected people to attack

An enormous blast of laser energy wiped out the whole west flank of the people.

Sora stood twirling her caster gun.

Krauser grinned and ran at her with super human speed.

Ada cried out "Sora look out!" but it was too late Sora was knocked out and thrown

Over Krauser's shoulder "Since I can't harm u physicaly I'll deal a hard blow to you're

Heart! Uboro's! finish them!"

Krauser was picked up by a helicopter.

Leon and Ada quickly dispenced of the Uboro's

Leon shouted to the heavens "Curse you Krauser!!!!"

END OF CHAPTER 2


	3. Chapter 3 captured and escape

RANDOM EVIL 4 ½

Ok I forgot but at the time I wrote this I had borrowed from a movie I saw and thought it would fit nicely into the theme of this chapter!…I am too lazy to come up with a new way to write this chap so lets make it a game… I'll mention the first persons name who can tell me what movie it is before the next chapter… The rest of the comedy is all me baby! Yea! And don't worry theres plenty of action coming you're way!

CHAPTER 3: Captured and Escape

Sora woke up in a dark room, and the first thing she noticed was her hands were tightly bound

Behind her back. Her first goal would be to try sit up.

To start this task she tried the old fashion "Sit Up" but unfortunately that didn't work. She heard

Talking outside the door so she inched over to the wall, leaned against it and pushed off the ground

With her feet forcing her to stand up. She walked over to the door which had a slide open spy hole

For checking on prisoners which was conveniently left open!

Krauser was on the other side in a control room with some military people.

XXX WITH KRAUSER XXX

(this is a borrowed comedy strip)

Krauser spoke to the commander. "Commander whats with this radar screen! What's all that churning and bubbling! you call that a radar!?"

The commander answered him "No sir! We call it… Mr. Coffee! Care for some?"

The commander began getting some coffee as Krauser spoke. "Yes! You know I always drink coffee while I watch radar…Everyone knows that!" All the military personnel in the room shouted.

"Of course we do SIR!"

Krauser took his coffee. "Now that I have my coffee…I'm ready to watch radar…Where is it?"

The camander took a step to the left. "Right here sir! Next to Mr. coffee is…Mr. Radar!"

Krauser began watching radar.

(End of first borrowed strip)

XXX WITH SORA XXX

Sora began working to escape. She managed to get the nail file from her shoe using her teeth.

And somehow managed to cut the ropes. She removed the floor panel.

"Holy crap! We're in a moving air ship! Good thing those idiots left me a jetpack with a note saying

"For authorized personnel only! DO NOT use to escape!"

Author: "That's kind of corny…."

As soon as Sora jumped through the panel alarms went off and she showed up on radar!

But she wasn't going back so easily!

XXX WITH KRAUSER XXX

(Second and Last borrowed comedy strip)

Krauser spit out his coffee "Fire a warning shot over her nose!"

The gunner began firing rapidly and explosive shells blew up all around Sora!

Krauser shouted "Careful you idiot! I said over her nose! OVER!"

The gunner turned around showing majorly crossed eyes. "Sorry sir! Doing my best!"

Krauser leaned over and spoke to the commander "Who made that man a gunner?"

Another gunner stood up and turned around showing even more crossed eyes. "I did sir!

He's my cousin!" Krauser spoke to the commander again. "Who the hell is he?"

"He's an asshole sir!" said the commander "I know that! whats his name!?" shouted Krauser

"That is his name sir! Asshole…Major Asshole!" said the commander. "And his cousin?"

Asked Krauser. "He's an asshole too sir! …Phillip J. Asshole!"

Krauser stood up. "How many assholes do we got on this ship!"

All the military people stood up and said "SIR!"

Krauser looked around rather irritated. "I can't believe I'm surrounded by Assholes!"

Krauser sat back down. "Keep firing! assholes!"

XXX WITH SORA XXX

Sora was dodging the exploding shells left and right, when suddenly one blew out an engine side of her jetpack! She flew out of control! Suddenly she stopped falling. A mechanical crane arm grabbed her

And pulled her inside. Krauser handcuffed her hands to 2 different walls in a porta potty sized bathroom.

She stood yelling at Krauser.

"Just let me go you jerk! I'm going to kick you sorry pathetic ass!………" Krauser started walking away

When she was secured. "Come on! I can't use the bathroom like this!…..Now I'm sad…"

AUTHOR: "Hey Sora maybe maybe if you ask real nice…"

Sora shouted "You stay out of this!"

END OF CHAPTER 3

AUTHORS NOTE: Uh huh! Uh huh! Oh yea yea yea! No flaming here tonight! No no no flaming here tonight! I gots the chapter up!

Now then….every time you neglect to push that little review button some one turns into a zombie…

Do you really want to infect our whole population with zombie's? DON'T DOOM US ALL!!REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW!….oh and read too…^_^


	4. Chapter 4 are we getting divorced? or

_**RANDOME EVIL 4 ½**_

_**CHAPTER 4: Are we getting divorced!? OR…The rescue begins!**_

_**Ada and Leon had been arguing for days now about who's fault it was that Krauser was alive!**_

_**Ada shouted at Leon. "Its ALL your fault! You didn't check to see if Krauser was dead!"**_

_**Leon shouted back "Well…uh…You're a JERK!" Ada shouted again "And MAYBE if yo had gone back to school or something you wouldn't be so stupid!"**_

_**AUTHOR: " oh! That was below the belt!" **_

_**Leon shouted again "Youre still a JERK!" Ada continued her rampage "I don't know why I didn't just **_

_**Marry a monkey!" Leon stood up "YOU LEAVE MY BEST FRIEND OUT OF THIS!!!….jerk…"**_

_**The helicopter pilot shouted back at them. "HEY! SHUT UP I CAN'T THINK STRAIGHT!"**_

_**Ada looked at Leon who was staring at the pie on the floor…**_

_**Author: "wait a minute! Where the hell did the pie come from!?"**_

_**Ada spoke. "Leon….I'm sorry I yelled…Forgive me?" Leon looked up from the pie "Of course I do!….**_

_**But you know…" Ada looked confused. "What?" Leon smirked. "You're still a jerk…heh…now who wants pie?" Ada got mad and slammed Leon's face into the pie. "There! Now we bth get what we want**_

_**You insensitive ASSHOLE!!!" But Leon didn't care…He was in pie heaven…"MMmmm…Pie!"**_

_**AUTHOR: "Wait a minute!…Asshole?…I wonder if Leon is related to Krauser's henchmen!…well**_

_**Maybe not.. :/.." **_

_**XXX WITH SORA XXX **_

_**Sora was still handcuffed in the tiny bathroom. And on a rampage shouting and swearing like a sailor!**_

_**And SERIOUSLY annoying the hell out of Krauser and every Asshole on the ship!**_

_**Finnaly Krauser brought over a long needle with pink fluid in it. "This will shut you up!"**_

_**Muttered Krauser. When he stuck it in her neck she bit him hard and refused to let go!**_

"_**AAAH! LET GO YOU STUPID BRAT!!!" Finally Sora passed out.**_

_**Krauser walked over to the doctor who gave him the needle. "Do you think this looks infected?"**_

_**Krauser said holding out his hand. The commander spoke. "We will be at our mountain village base**_

_**In Africa soon sir!"**_

_**XXX WITH LEON XXX**_

_**Leon and Ada split up into 2 teams on separate military drop planes.**_

_**Leon sat in the back of the drop plane smoking a cigar. A soldier came up to him "Hey! Put out that cigar!**_

_**Leon was wearing a drab colored sky diving heavy wind suit with parachute harness. **_

_**Leon ignored him and kept smoking…mainly because he thought it made him look cool…That's the **_

_**ONLY reason he did it….pathetic…**_

_**The soldier shouted again… "HEY! Did you hear me!? Get into position!" Leon ignored him again.**_

_**The soldier spoke. "Who is this guy!?" Leon flicked the cigar across the plane's back room in slow motion so it looked twice as cool as it would if he didn't do it at all….**_

_**AUTHOR: "For those who can't do the math…that's 0.50 percent cooler then not being cool! What a stud **_

_**Right!?"**_

_**Leon put on his gas mask looking air breathing device and got into position. The drop hatch opened and the wind made the cigar roll towards the drop. Leon steped on it extinguishing it. Another 0.02 points added to his already soaring score!…**_

_**Leon turned to the others. "Lets go fly! LIKE APPLE PIE!!!" He jumped out in a flip.**_

_**The soldiers looked at each other "Apple pie?" Another smacked his forehead "What a doosh bag!"**_

_**But just as they started to get ready to jump a rocket propelled grenade hit the gas tank and blew the **_

_**Plane up!**_

_**XXX WITH DOOSHBAG..ER..LEON! XXX**_

_**Leon heard the explosion and looked up and saw… A flaming plane headed for him!**_

_**Leon straightened up like a toothpick and the mid sections hull fell over her and he went through the middle opening un harmed then ran up the tail section of the plane and jumped avoiding the sharpened edges barely. Leon through his hands up in the air. "WOOOO!!!!" Suddenly a small bird smacked into his head. "OWWW!!!! STUPID BIRD!!" **_

_**Leon activated his parachute and landed gracefully on the ground…**_

_**He put his radio up to his ear and Hunnigan answered. **_

_**AUTHOR: "HOLY CRAP!!! CRAZIES BACK!!! For those who don't know…read the the story I mentioned before…"**_

_**Hunnigan spoke. "Leon! Glad we could work together again!" Leon was surprised "Hunnigan? They let**_

_**You out of Rehab so soon?" Hunnigan scowled "Quit making fun of me! And listen! Ada is on the opposite side of the mountain! And I'm not sure but there was a third plane in the area earlier with Tricell's Logo! We suspect Wesker! Anyway…you will meet up with Ada on the mountain!"**_

_**Leon interrupted "Wait! Wesker!? Didn't I go to kindergarten with him?" There was silence…**_

"_**HOW THE HELL DO I KNOW!?" shouted Hunnigan and she hung up.**_

_**Leon stood up and took off his oxygen mask and wind suit revealing his baggy cargo pants and black combat boots…A survival vest and A BRAND NEW LEATHER JACKET!!!! **_

_**He pulled out his hand gun and started up hill…He was met by a group of Terrorists who started firing HK-47's at him. But then they started firing at something else. And the first thing Leon saw was a plant**_

_**Tentacle grab a terrorist and rip him apart! A large plant with a bulb was hanging from a tree.**_

_**Soon the terrorists were all bloodied up! And Leon was free to walk his merry way to the village.**_

_**Leon made it the village. He saw saw Ada walk by and shouted "ADAAAAAAA!!" shouted Leon.**_

"_**LEOONNNNN!!!" shouted Ada "Are you making fun of me?" asked Leon "I told you it's an acid reflex I can't control it I just have to shout you're name to the heavens!" **_

_**Ada laughed. "Lets just find Sora! I hope we arent too late!"**_

_**END OF CHAPTER 4**_

_**WOOOO!!!! The chapters done!**_

_**Just remember… every time you ignore that little review button.. God kills a kitty…**_

_**SO R&R ….jerk….**_


	5. its a bird! its a plane! its

AUTHORS NOTE: sorry i havent updated in a while....my moms laptop went caput when some rainbow retard repairman accidently deleted the windows thingy file!

but hey! on with the show!

CHAPTER 5: Its a bird! Its a plane! Its....

xxx WITH ADA xxx

Ada was now dressed in a pair of black jeans and combat boots abd wore a survival vest. she also wore a squiggly pair of round orange lense sun glasses.

she jumped from rooftop to rooftop. she jumped to the next roof and a oruboro spotted her. but before it could do anything it got a taste of Ada's fan kick!

it fell of the roof and into deep snow. Ada wasn't sure if it was dead..she just hoped it drowned in the snow.

Ada grabbed the radio. "This is gold leader! to red leader! do you copy?!" there was static over the radio then..a ear piercing yell was heard over the radio.

"III LOVE CHERRY PIE!!!!" Ada growled. "LEON!!! what the hell are you doing on red leaders radio!?" there was silence. "Umm...he was sharing his pie with me."

Ada began shouting at Leon.

xxx WITH LEON xxx

Leon listened for a moment then put his hand over the radio. "KSSSH! your breaking up!....I....cant....hear.....Im going through a tunnel!...

made of pie!...." Leon threw his radio to chazz and was on his way...

xxx WITH ADA xxx

Ada signaled her 3 operatives to move in and ambush the sentry at the entrance to what Ada thought was the base of Krauser.

they took the sentry out and without a second thought entered the base.

xxx WITH SORA xxx

sora sat handcuffed to a pole in the center of the control room.

"8 bottles of soda 8 bottle of soda......take one down.....beat the shit outa krauser with it....and then...ah screw it...."

Krauser was watching Mr. Radar when he noticed Ada had made it inside the base. and Leon wasn't far behind.

Krauser laughed evily. "Hold them here commander...I think its time i pay Leon a visit!...Load the girl in my escape plane!..."

xxx WITH LEON xxx

Leon ran up to the gates of the base and he stopped when he saw a oruboro with a chainsaw. he had a bag tied around his head with ropes and 1 Eye hole...

he had no shirt on and his skin was wrinkly and gray. He started the chainsaw. Then a house exploded into splinters as a El Gigante smashed it!

They were on both sides of Leon! he grabbed his 9mm handgun and ran at the chainsaw guy screaming. "MERRY HAD A LITTLE CHAINSAW  
WIELDING FREAK!!!" Leon then at the last second as the oruboro raised his chainsaw launched his kick of doom! and sent the man into the snow.

he raised his radio. "BRING IN THE CLONES!!!" the general answered. "Uh dude...this isnt starwars!" Leon grabbed a lightsaber. "Then what am i supposed to

do with this!?" he then noticed it was fake. but failed to notice the chainsaw man behind him... "DIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!" chainsaw freakshow. Leon screamed like a little

girl and kicked freakshow in the mc nuggets... "AAAAHHH!!!" freakshow dropped his chainsaw and Leon picked it up.. "AH-HA!" just then the El Gigante

swatted Leon hard and sent him flying onto the roof of the base where he was met by Krauser...

xxx With General Chazz (Who is more important then i thought he should be!) xxx

Chazz lead an army of soldiers against the uroboro's he fired his 2 blacktail hand guns... suddenly a bunch of bloddy soldiers crashed into a house nearby...

The el gigante roared and pushed over a house. Chazz talked in his radio "ALL AVAILABLE SOLDIERS FIRE AT THAT BEAST!!!"

suddenly chazz seen Leon leon jump off the roof and shouted "NO I DONT WANNA DIE!!! MOMMY HELP ME!!!"

chazz sighed "Idiot..."

xxx WITH 2 SOLDIERS xxx

2 soldiers stood looking at the sky while people got killed all around them...

"Yea..my toothpaste collection is getting pretty sweet!" said the one on the left. "Well my bottle cap collection is soaring!" said the one on the right.

"Hey whats that falling in the sky?" soldier 1... "Its a bird!" said soldier 2 "No its a plane! said soldier 1 "No its a sack of rice potatoes!" said soldier 2

"Hey i think youre right!" Said soldier 1. just then chazz slapped em both upside the head. "No you idiots! it the author!"

as if on cue a godzilla sized author crashed down on her feet! "I!! AM!!! ULTRA AUTHOR!!!"

the author slaughtered the uroboros.

Leon could be heard in the backround "MERRY PIE-MAS!!!"

xxx WITH LEON (five minutes ago) xxx

Leon ran in persuit of Krauser as he jumped over stuff then Krauser crouched down and jumped 25 feet up to the next rooftop of the base.

Leon had to climb the ladder. when he got up he saw krauser climbing into a small jet. and he saw.... "SORAAA!!!" shouted Leon

He sprinted towards the plane as it took off. he dove off the roof in a last effort attempt to grab the planes wheel. he missed by a country mile...

"NO I DONT WANNA DIE!!!" he flapped his arms trying to fly "MOMMY HELP ME!!!"

he fell... He landed in another jet plane piloted by Ada! Ada spoke. "Morning sunshine! My name...is Sea Bear! and i will be youre pilot for today!

Please fasten you're seatbelts and..." Leon interrupted. "Can i drive!?" Leon grabbed the controls on his side. "NO LEON! DONT TOUCH THAT!!"

they started doing barrel rolls until Ada regained control. Ada gave him a slice of pie. "MERRRY PIIIE MAS!!!" shouted Leon.

Ada and Leon flew in hot persuit of Krauser and Sora. suddenly Leon pulled out a rocket launcher and fired at krauser.

"DIIIIIEE!!!!" Ada screamed. "LEON YOU IDIOT!! YOU'RE GONNA KILL SORA!!!"

The rocket hit dead on on Krausers jet plane and they fell into the surrounding forest as a flaming ball of fire!"

Ada and Leon landed nearby where they crashed and found no sign of krauser but Sora had a nasty gash in her thigh and was bleeding heavily!

just then people with guns knocked out Leon and Ada and dragged them away with Sora...

END OF CHAPTER 5

Me: who are these mysterious strangers? what do they want? Why am i asking you these questions? stay tuned and find out!"

R & R cause every time you ignore that little review button a zombie bites Leon! and Leon loses some health! and no he doesnt have any first aid spray,herbs

or eggs! not any fish or any restoring items! so dont let Leon die!!!


	6. Escape Tricell Base

RANDOM EVIL 4 1/2

Author: sorry for the long waited update...not that i have anybody besides a friend reading this but I was just bein lazy and never wanting to update......What!? I'm not gonna lie!!! Anyway...

Disclaimer: I don't own resident evil...Capcom does, but i own Sora as far as I know!

CHAPTER 6: Escape Tricell base...

Sora opened her eye's slightly she saw bubbles float upwards when she breathed out. She was behind glass...In a tank of water.  
She closed her eyes and opened them a little bit again. She could make out people staring at her and charting closed her eyes and this time they didn't open for quite some time.

XXXXX 1 month later XXXXX

Sora opened her eyes and found herself laying on a research table naked, except a large white sheet was covering her upper and lower torso but not her legs, arms or head. She just stared at the cieling like she was doped. She was in shock from being asleep for so long. The doctor was talking. "We've done it nurse! we've brought the dead back to life! Without the T-Virus's animation!" The nurse was sitting at a computer typing. "Thats nice doctor...." She said still typing.  
The doctor continued his fat ass on bragging. "I mean just look at this!" He said and pulled the sheet off Sora's thigh showing a nicely healed gash that was now a lightly pink scar. "Does this look like a fatal fleshwound?"  
The nurse sighed. "No Doctor Carter..." The doctor covered Sora's thigh beck up. He pulled out a light and shined it in one of Sora's eyes and moved it back and forth which Sora followed. "Miss, can you hear me?...Do you have anything to say?" Sora opened her mouth to speak. "Yea..I'm kind of hungry..Do you have any pie or maybe a bag of skittles?"  
The doctor was confused. "Skittles?" Sora nodded "Yea i love those little bags of skittles LOVE them!"

The doctor looked dumbfounded. "Nurse...Can we get a cat scan on the specimen?" The nurse began typing and listened to some headphones. "Doctor....you might want to hear this..." The doctor walked over to the headphones and put them on.

BRAIN WAVES: OOOOH I'm so happy I can hardly breath! puppy frogs and polly wogs, Kittens baby teeth! Oh it's a liiitle sugar coated meee! happier then a coupon for a twenty dollar whore!!! .....I'm out of here!...SCREW YOU.  
ECHO!-O-O-O-O-O-o-o-ooooh.....

XXXXXXXX BACK TO REALITY XXXXXXX

The doctor sighed. "I'll look into this later...." The doctor set Sora u in a room with a pink nightgown for girls.  
The first thing Sora noticed was... She was in the base of Tricell! And how did she come to this conclusion? Its a little trick called...read the clipboard!

XXXXX With Leon And Ada XXXXX

Ada and Leon were already awake and were planning an escape. Leon kept annoyingly knocking on the metal door while Ada sang the happy sunshiney was in a yellow night gown and Leon was in blue duckey pajama's wich strangly...he liked... A gaurd came in to stop them but Leon broke his neck. "Come on Ada!"

Leon and Ada ran down the halls Ada was practicly being dragged. "We have to find Sora!" Shouted Ada.

Alarms were going off and red flashing lights were....flashing... A group of armed gunmen blocked the exit.

Leon shouted and picked up Ada. "No time for pie! JUMP!!" Leon and Ada jumped out the 4th story window.

AUTHOR: Now...some of you may be wondering how 2 people could survive such a jump...well...look at it this way.  
If Leon and Ashley can survive jumping from the second floor down the garbage shoot and into the asement full of sharp metali objects THEN WHY THE HELL NOT!?!?!? I rest my case....

XXXX WITH SORA XXXX

Sora heard the alarms go off and wondered if it was her as she shimmied down the drainpipes. Sora reached the ground.  
2 People shouted. "HEY! It's another one! shoot her!" Sora turned and ran, gun fire began going off all around her.  
She quickly ran into the forest. "Hold it men! She won't survive in there...Let the Uraboro's get her..."

XXXXX WITH LEON AND ADA XXXXX

Ada and Leon were in the forest and had already killed 2 Uraboro's with theyre bare hands. They were running when they saw A girl run by and an Uraboro jumped out of a tree and grabbed her around the throat. Some freaky tounge/plant thing came from its mouth and tried to put it in the girls mouth.

Leon shouted. "WOA! ITS A FRENCHY!!!" Ada rolled her eyes. "Umm...Isn't frenchy the name of that girl on Grease? If not what the hell are you talking about!?"

Leon rolled his eyes. "Well you know how all the resident evil games have like names for certain enemies like, Licker,Runner and stuff!? Well I dub this one FRENCHY!! cause he's trying to french kiss her!"

The girl screamed. "Get OFF me you freak!" and throat punched the Uraboro crushing it's wind pipe.

Ada sighed "For the last time Leon...We did not take part in any video game series of any kind...That was just a bad dream..."  
The girl walked up to them. Leon shouted "OMG!!! ITS SORA!!" he hugged her.

They walked to a nearby town. The town was mostly deserted, So to the cherity of the deserted town The Kennedy family raided a clothing and weapon store!

Leon took a white T-shirt, and a pair of torn blue jeans and a brown leather jacket with black stripes on the shoulders.  
and a pair of brown combat boots. He also took a M92F handgun, a reinforced carbon alloy steel Survival knife with surrated edges, and a Ithaca M37 shotgun. He strapped the shotgun across his back.

Ada took a red cocktail dress that was like a one piece shirt-skirt and a pair of black skintight kneelong shorts and a pair of black high top tennishoes. She also took a H&K P8 handgun, A small switch blade, And VZ61 Machine gun.

Sora took a black tanktop with black baggy kneelong shorts with lots of chains on them and black and red high top tennishoes. She took 2 Persian style machete's with cresent blades, 1 belt with hand grenades and 1 with flash & incendiary grenades. and she criss crossed them across her waiste. She also needed a handgun...She had lost her caster gun, she picked a magnum from behind the counter and put it at her hip.

They walked through the streets of the town. occasionaly they would come across a dead body or two. Soon they came to a special place called..... "JENNIES WORLD OF PIE!!!" shouted Leon like a giddy little girl.

Author: "HEY! THAT WAS MY LINE!! T_T

suddenly armed men ran into the streets. "There they are!" shouted one. They had FLAK jackets on and wore the TRICELL logo.  
They were armed with AK-47's they opened fire. Ada pulled out her H&K P8 handgun and opened fire. Leon leaned back in slow motion while the bullets zoomed passed him at normal speed about killing him for his stupidity! Sora drew both her cresent blades and ran along the streets swurving in and out of debree for cover from the barrage of bullets. She came close to them and leapt at one with a spin-like move and twirled both her blades then beheaded one of the guy's.

The squad captain shouted. "Break formation!" The tricell squadren started spreading out and hiding behind debree. Sora flipped around and jumped ontop of turned over cars and big chunks of broken buildings while killing Tricell operatives.  
She smiled at her agility thinking she would have to thank her mother for putting her through special training.

Leon kicked one of the soldiers to the ground. "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!" he said and unloaded a whole clip on him. Sora jumped up onto a boulder and thew her left blade at the captain and nailed him in the shoulder.  
She jumped at him stabbing him in the gut. The captain just coughed up blood. Sora decided to finish him off by drawing her magnum and blew is head off. She retrieved er blades and kicked him to the ground.

The res of the members of the gun squad fled.

Sora jumped and shouted. "WOOOOOOOOOO!!!! YEA!!!" Leon High fived her. Ada sighed. "Crazy kid.."

END OF CHAPTER 6... Next chapter: Wesker & Krauser V.S. team Kennedy!

ME: ok in the next chapter It starts to cross over with resident evil 5... now..i'm just going to tell you.  
I have never played resident evil 5! i've seen a few youtube videos of people playing it and I know a few parts.  
It will be no where close to the story line of the actual game...cause seriously folks...would it really be entertaining reading the EXACT FREAKIN STORY!? also other charectors will apear in this story such as HUNK... OKAAYY?  
alrighty then...PLZ REVIEW!

w 


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